The Hug Poem - Bradley Hathaway

The Hug Poem

Bradley Hathaway

...

I read about how you touched them, and they were healed

Or even if someone just touched your cloak

they were forever changed

You let a broken woman bathe your feet in her tears

and you washed your best friends' feet.

I'm just wondering though,

Did you ever just hug people?

I mean I know it's a silly question and all,

I am sure you would have, why wouldn’t you?

But its one of those things that was never mentioned that got me thinking about it...

And how whenever there was a touch from you,

sins were forgiven and sickness fell.

I think I’m caught up in my sins,

last time I checked all my body parts were properly working,

nothing special here.

I am just a kid with a heavy heart

these passing sunrises and sunsets.

I don’t think our encounter would have ended up in the gospels or anything

Because all I really need is a hug.

That's okay for me to imagine right?

That’s not going to be conflicting with any sort of theology is it?

Okay good, then hug me.

But not one of these sideways one arm around the neck type hugs

Or the ghetto right hand clasp fists elbows to chest

pat pat on the back back

Or you put your right arm over my left arm

and I put my right arm under your left arm

and we make this weird sort of diagonal thing.

No, none of those!

BEAR HUG ME MAN!

Take your old school carpenter arms

and throw them over my upper body

leaving my arms dangling

underneath yours somewhere so

I can barely move them because you're squeezing so hard.

(But don’t pick me up and make my back pop because I hate it when people do that).

And then hold me,

hold me here in your arms until I start to cry because

I WANT TO CRY

But I just can’t seem to do it on my own

I have been teary eyed once recently but not even enough for a

drip down my cheek.

There's just hurt in my soul that needs to be purged

so hold me in this hugging pose until the pain is flowing from my eyes and nose.

...

I could really use a hug right now.

Midterms!

The past week or so has been relatively insane as far my studies have gone, and in terms of what I have learned.

I spent thanksgiving weekend hitting the books, and not in the literal sense. Although I probably wouldn't have minded literally hitting some of them by the end.

Last Thursday was my Philosophy midterm, which I haven't gotten the results of yet, but I feel as though I did well on it. The test was just answering 3 essay questions. SO much writing! I wrote a good 10 pages double sided, I think.

This week Tuesday was my Chemistry Lab Problem Session. It was challenging, especially given the time limit. I feel better about today though--I wrote my Biology midterm this morning and I think I did really well on it. Or I hope so anyway! You never quite know at university it seems.

I'm looking forward to all this craziness ending...tests at university make me so anxious. For the two midterms I've written so far, I've woken up at 5am on the day of the test, and ended up just heading off to school really early in the morning since I am too worried to sleep and too preoccupied to eat breakfast or anything like that. It's a bad feeling...but I guess I end up getting a couple extra hours of studying in this way?

After my midterm today, I went to the gym like I do every Wednesday. It felt so good to just be able to not think about studying for an hour or two, and sweat some of the stress off.

After all, you know you've studied too much when you comment to your mom that the family laundry basket looks like a mitochondria.

Then later in the afternoon, I went to my first Campus for Christ meeting, which was interesting. It was a little awkward, just because we don't know each other really at all yet, but I think it will get better with time, and could turn out to be really fun and beneficial.

We talked about living a spirit-filled life, that is, learning to have Christ at the center of our lives more and more. I think all Christians have times when they put themselves first...I think it's what's natural for humans. If there is anyone out there who always has God first, I admire them wholeheartedly.

For me...I'm thankful God is gracious, and forgiving to me. I mess up a lot, and get wrapped up in my own worries far too often. I want to control everything that happens and give it to Him at the same time...but I know this kind of paradox is not possible. It's all or nothing, as far as I'm concerned, and I want Him to have it all.

And I need Him. I think I would be such a wreck if I didn't have Him in my life.